Art of Parenting – 10 Golden Rules
Parenting is the ultimate long-term investment. If you’re a parent, you get plenty of suggestions on how to raise your child. From experts to other parents, people are always ready to offer advice. Every moment of our life we add something in the memory of our kids. At Art of Parenting, the most overwhelming key to a child’s success is the positive involvement of parents.
As a teacher, I come across my parents who keep complaining about their child’s behaviour. I have also come across so many children, some extremely introvert, some stressed out and some rebellious. I would like to share ten golden rules about the art of parenting.
This may sound weird but in my teaching career I have come across parents who don’t realize their responsibilities towards their kids. There are fights, use of vulgar language and lots more by the parent in front of the kids. Parents are the first teachers of a child. They are responsible not only for the child’s physical growth but also responsible for psychological growth and hence they need to be careful and responsible with their words and actions.
- Personal Sacrifices
Parents have to make little personal sacrifices for their children, not once or twice but many times. This may be like sacrificing their TV or Entertainment time to help their kids with studies, etc. Take out time to see what your child is learning at school. The greater sacrifices you make, the greater appreciation you get from your child.
- Parents Are Teachers
Parents are child’s first teachers, especially a mother, is said to be the GURU of the child. Parents lay down the basic foundation for their child. Children are thought to differentiate between good or bad. Parents help in shaping a child’s life. A parent’s role as a teacher in a child’s life never comes to an end. No matter how big the child has grown, he will always need a GURU in his life. And that GURU is a parent.
- Child Is A Keen Observer
Parents please be aware of this point. Your child is always observing/watching you. Children learn a lot by observation. Children, especially young ones, observe and imitate their parents. Words spoken by you are picked up by them. So you need to be very careful about how you behave and talk around your kids.
- No Comparison
Please do not compare your child with anybody else especially their siblings. Never tell them that if another child can do it, why can’t you? Comparison only makes your child lose self confidence. She/he will always be afraid to do something thinking they won’t be able to live up to your expectations. Comparison hurts your child and their growth is hampered. Each child is unique.
You need to be patient with your child. Not all children are the same. If your child is a slow learner, please understand him and help him out and don’t lose your temper and start getting angry on your child. Children do drive you mad sometimes, especially the little ones. Hence, it is easy for a parent to lose patience and shout at them. But, we never realize that sometimes we may blurt out something in anger that may leave a permanent mark on their minds. If you get really angry, just take 3 deep breaths, countdown to ten and then discipline your child.
Learn to appreciate the little things your child does for you. Your child must have prepared a card for you and in that process might have dirtied the house. In such a case, don’t get angry on your child. Instead, appreciate their effort. Appreciation should be sincere and honest. A simple smile, or applause, or patting your child’s back, or dancing and jumping along with your child are some ways you can appreciate your child’s work. Appreciation motivates your child to do better. When you stop comparing your child with others and start appreciating your child’s efforts, you will see your child grow and develop.
- Individual Differences
Each child is born with unique inherited qualities. Some are genius, some are average, some are slow learners and some are below average. If your child is not a fast learner don’t compare him with others. If your child is talented in doing something encourage him to pursue his talent.
- Balance Between Love And Discipline
Too much love may be harmful for your child. There should be a balance between love and discipline. If your child is doing something wrong, you need to correct him. When I say correct him, I don’t mean to beat him or use harsh language, but instead tell him what is wrong and were.
- All Round Development
Focus on the all round development of your child. Give importance to their talents along with their education. Help them be independent and let them have their own adventures. Sometimes, for a child to develop, he needs to know failure and how to rise from it. So if your child fails at something, don’t let him give up but encourage him to try again.
Art of Parenting is an art and not science. And this makes it complicated yet a beautiful experience. I like to end this post with a wonderful quote by Barbara Johnson –
“To be in your children’s memories tomorrow, you have to be in their lives today.”